Gramps

Today is the fourteenth anniversary of my grandfather passing away. I was 11 at the time and I don't know how old he was. We called him Grumpy Gramps because he was a bit of a curmudgeon. His real name is Robert Smith Pine and he's from upstate New York. He was an attorney in El Paso and worked in the same building, the Bassett Tower, where my Dad also works (although they are turning it into condominiums so he had to move out last weekend). Things I remember vividly about Gramps are going to Bella Napoli's for Italian food, knowing not to play with my hair at the dinner table because he'd discipline me, his stylish and formal clothes, his unobtrusive laughter, swimming in the ocean with him, watching him eat breakfast and drink a tall glass of milk, him arguing with my dad over who would pay the bill, playing Gin Rummy with him...When I would forget or lose my blanket, "Lala," he would sing a catchy little song with the blanket wrapped around his head: "I love my lala yes I do." He was really quiet in hindsight, and I don't remember a ton. Funny how that happens, the memory fades but somehow certain things you can never forget. Arbitrary things. I remember the day he died. I came home from school and Tracy was there and Gramps was sleeping in the extra bedroom where our computer was. He'd been there for a few weeks during his last time. I didn't realize what him living with us signified. Then Tracy noticed, Mom made the phone calls, and then ya, he was gone.

I also remember the day I was playing on the floor in my grandparent's house when the family was passing around charts and papers and discussing this cancer the doctors had found. I stopped, and listened, and went back to playing. How was I supposed to know.

I don't have any digital photos of Gramps, or else I would post one here. If he were here alive today I would hope to have dinner with him tonight. We'd have some wine and eat too much and laugh and talk about things. I don't know what things. Maybe about Lala and how much I loved it.

I miss you Grumpy Gramps.